BBBEnthusiast
patreon
Women in history (Belly U)
🕑 Added 2025-08-11 02:08:33 +0000 UTC
*A large lecture hall. The chalkboard reads “HST 204: Origins of Inflation Studies.”*
Professor Minton waddles to the front of the room, her enormous, globe-like belly swaying gently with each step. She lowers herself into her chair, then leans forward so far that her middle rests comfortably on the desk, like a beanbag pillow. She adjusts her glasses, tapping them against the wooden surface.
Professor Minton: "Alright, class, settle in. Today we talk about the woman who started it all — Priscilla Bloomford, known around the academic world as The Mother of Chemical Inflation."
A ripple of excitement moves through the students. Everyone at Belly U knows the name.
Professor Minton clicks a button, and a large, slightly faded photograph appears on the projector screen. The image is of a young woman in her mid-20s, standing in a sunlit meadow bursting with tall, pastel-colored flowers. Her blue dress billows out dramatically in front, stretched taut by a perfect roundness. Her hands rest on the curve, and she wears a smirk that says she knows something you don’t.
Student 1: "Was that… from before the controlled inflation protocols?"
Professor Minton: "Correct. Back then, it was just experimentation and curiosity. No lab coats, no safety harnesses… just Priscilla, her flower press, and a willingness to drink whatever concoction she brewed."
The professor rolls her chair to the chalkboard, her belly making a soft fwump against it when she stops.
Professor Minton: "Priscilla discovered that a specific combination of three meadow flowers, when steeped in water and left in the sun, caused the drinker’s midsection to expand rapidly — much like a bread loaf rising in the oven. She didn’t use it for serious research at first. Oh no… she mostly used it to mess with people."
The class chuckles.
Student 2: "Mess with people how?"
Professor Minton: "She would stroll through the village market, feigning shock as her belly swelled mid-conversation, and then insist she had suddenly become 'mysteriously expectant.' You can imagine the chaos this caused among her many suitors."
Another click of the projector shows a hand-drawn diagram from Priscilla’s original notebook — crude sketches of flower heads, a teapot, and increasingly round silhouettes labeled “Stage 1” through “Stage 4.”
Professor Minton: "Her antics aside, Bloomford laid the groundwork for our entire field. Today, we have over 300 documented inflation methods, from pneumatic to hydraulic, but chemical remains the oldest… and arguably the most stylish."
She pats her own middle with a grin.
Professor Minton: "And as you can see, the tradition is alive and well."
