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Thanksgiving Debacle

🕑 Added 2023-11-28 23:10:19 +0000 UTC

Comments

LMP

Who says they aren’t listening in “in secret” occasionally? After hearing how they are publicly disparaged they probably wouldn’t want to admit to it. They know of its existence for sure

LMP

Some people would be offended by that. So people just endure things they don’t enjoy out of generosity

The Bruenigs

this is it: https://www.foodgallery32nyc.com/ Enjoy!

idonthighfive

I’m here because of The Dumb Zone. Just pressed play. I hope I’m intelligent enough.

Joanna Kenney

Can someone tell me the name or cross streets of the Korea town food hall? I want to go!

AllOutOfPlans

Regarding my last comment on AGTE, that was more for Liz, for Matt I offer the following. Matt, your plan maximizes utility for the group, but your assumed and false premise is that all adult individuals must cooperate for those utilities to be realized, but this is unreasonable given that you know that cooperation will not be achieved. What you want is a plan that maximizes utility but does not require cooperation.

AllOutOfPlans

FWIW, I would just recontextualized the Annual Grandparents Thanksgiving Experience (AGTE). Your goal is for the kids and grandparents to have time together, and anything over that is just a plus. So, none of your plans are for the sake of accomplishing anything, but just an excuse to be together - a missed train is still a win. It's a sort of self-abnegation or Buddhist relinquishment of desire, because is it the desire of accomplishing your plans that leads to suffering.

Skeleton Key

It was really something else listening to your Debacle story for someone who grew up with a narcissistic man-child father, and who used that exact same train station into the city, growing up. Not a bad thing, I wasn't retraumatized or anything, but I definitely was feeling that tale.

Tim Masterson

How much do you think it's about wanting that restaurant experience and how much of it is about wanting to be the one who makes the decision? Some people just can't handle following someone else's plans.

J P 3

Even if the parents/in-laws don't always appreciate the work that you all do, in another 20-30 years I imagine both your kids will really appreciate having a record of these events and stories.

TC

I also forgot Liz had a brother lol. Was he an academic/debate genius, too?

Caitlin Still

Shat brix when Liz’s NPC brother is suddenly mentioned when he had not been in my mental picture the whole pod. There’s either so much more to know about this guy or literally nothing.

Caitlin Still

Fussy is a kind word.

Caitlin Still

I had never heard of it until this year. Got lent it by a friend and read. Now I hear of it constantly. My only qualm is that it didn’t tell us how to traumatise the boomers back.

Andrew Scott

matt asked if people enjoy these stories and I don't think enjoy is the right word but I do find them engaging in a kind of rapt, horrified, anxiety inducing kind of way

MRP

I feel guilty enjoying these episodes as much as I do but I have a Borderline parent and hearing these stories is very therapeutic to know it's not just me

Chris

Liz dads on island time

Sarah

Liz it’s really a testament to your dedication to Christian charity that you haven’t poisoned your dad at least a little bit yet

KMB24

Some people don’t know how to say “that doesn’t interest me, let’s do something else or y’all go on ahead without me” and instead decide to be miserable the entire time. An offshoot of main character syndrome I think.

Zak

I love that K-town 3 story food court, used to eat there all the time when I was down there a lot.

Adrienne Hubbard

Liz, you probably know of this book, but "Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents" by Lindsay Gibson helped me tremendously dealing with the kind of situations you describe with your parents. Highly recommend to anyone who can relate.

Adrienne Hubbard

Also hi Justin. Cousin coalescence in the Bruenig comment section.

Adrienne Hubbard

It really made me think about the eternal frustration of being the adult child of imperfect parents/grandparents; you are old and wise enough and have spent enough time psychoanalyzing yourself to really understand their flaws and motivations (Appreciated Matt's cause-effect analysis of Liz's dad and his motivations, as I often think the same way about people) and also aware enough to realize there's absolutely jack shit you can do to influence or motivate any sort of change. But being decent and not wanting to cut off family entirely, you just have to to tolerate it and grit your teeth and pray for patience and understanding. It sucks!

Steve Babitz

Interestingly, I believe, Bergen County, NJ has the highest population density of Koreans outside of Seoul

Steve Babitz

If you guys like Korean food, you should definitely check out Palisades Park/Fort Lee, NJ area if you haven’t already. Also some good hiking along the Palisades with some good views of the city. Highly recommend Sazanami Curry Bar, Mama Chicken, Aquarius Restaurant, Tofu Village, Kimbap Club, Totowah, Halmae Noodle, and/or Woori Dumpling

Orb

Matt’s very defeated “…yeah” after hearing the across the aisle sexual kink headline killed me

Orb

Believe they’ve said on multiple occasions that Liz’s parents are not listening to the pod lol

ChapoFan inParis

Did the Bruenigs consider that Liz' Dad might be passive-aggressively sabotaging family vacations as revenge for all the painfully-detailed play-by-plays of what terrible grandparents Liz' parents are? "We spent a fortune on our grandkids' Xmas presents only to get publically roasted for it on their podcast. So no, I don't care about making the stinking train."

Nicole

Are you two able to enjoy time away from the kids when they are with your parents?

Josh B

Traveling with fussy family can be the absolute worst. The part of the story about the overpacking and how hard it makes travel described why I dread traveling with my parents perfectly. Props to you both for handling it gracefully. Whenever my parents' fussiness inconveniences strangers, the anxiety of the situation just makes me want to die lol

Peter Flynn

If a dad like that can accidentally raise a daughter like Liz, there is hope for humanity.

Christian Hunt

My fav part of the pod

TS + KL

I can't believe you guys never lose your shit and yell at your family. These stories give me so much anxiety. I would definitely not be able to handle them without a meltdown.

Justin Hubbard

This episode was as entertaining as it was frustrating. Idk if I could handle dealing with your dad, Liz, you’re a trooper. Your mom deserves an extra hug.

Surna

I grew up in a family that very rarely ate out and was in a long term relationship with someone who's family was very restaurant oriented. I grew to realize that for them it wasn't really about the food so much as it was about the experience of having options and being served and catered to. I am probably TikTok autistic and find interactions with people who are required to be nice to me unsettling and I hadn't realized how much other people might enjoy being waited on until then.