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Fears and Worries. Silly Jiggly Joys.
🕑 Added 2024-09-04 16:12:36 +0000 UTCI remember taking this picture almost a full year ago and thinking how huge my boobs had grown. That bra is a J cup in US sizes and the fact that I had started overflowing it was making me really nervous.
If I'd known they would more than double that size in a year I probably would've cried on the spot.
People had already started to treat me really different at this point. My best friend had begun asking me on a regular basis if they were bigger. It got to a point where every time I saw her I could feel a little tinge of anxiety in my belly because I knew I'd have to tell her
"yes, they're still growing, and yes theyre bigger right now."
One of my patrons asked me about a week ago if I would write about my biggest fears surrounding my breasts growth. I've talked to a few of you in messages on here, and a common question is
"how do you feel about your boobs?"
I feel like I'm still pretty split on this. Good and bad. Half the time I'm actually in awe, just totally shocked. Surprised, looking down, these are mine. Staring down and seeing all this jiggly meat... that's... actually me. When they move I can feel them, and recently they've been super sore and tender from the continued growth, but it's still very easy for me to kinda dissociate from them and not see them as me, or part of me. To see them as two selfish blobs, that take and take. In my more positive moments, on the good boob days, I couldn't even imagine this perspective, but, on the bad boob days... I looked down at them and just pray that they'll stop growing.
Pray that ill feel better about it all soon.
On my good boob days I'm actually so happy. I find my hands barely leave them all day, absent-mindedly jiggling and massaging them. They make me feel confident and posting online is a joy.
"Look at how special they are, look how special I am because of them!" My head seems to spout all day long. It's a little corny how good I feel about them on these days.
It's a weird dichotomy because, it's almost like two different parts of my brain that can't understand each other.
For instance, today I'm having a very good boob day. They weren't so sore last night that I lost sleep, and they're feeling very tender and sensitive in a good way. On days like this I bask in the sensations they bring my brain. An oxytocin waterfall pouring peace and calm over me everytime I squish and squeeze them, which ends up being large portions of the day.
It's days like these that I end up letting my curiosity about natural breast growth techniques bring me on internet journeys I would never think of on bad boob days.
I will say that I may be on the spectrum for how obsessive my thinking can get. Occasionally. I have stimulus overload and feel like I need to retreat a bit. My pair of noise canceling headphones gets pretty constant use.
One of the ways I found I can stim may be amusing to y'all. A way i tend to dissociate into my chest.
I plop my boobs on the kitchen table or my desk, which is a great height to take their weight off my back. Then I lower my head into them face first. They are so soft and fat, my face feels cradled by a big warm pillow. I feel very safe like this. The weight of my breasts supported by the table, the weight of my head supported by my breasts.
It's a little embarrassing though. As I breathe into them, there's no room for the air escape except through my cleavage and across my face. My chubby boobs are so soft now that the air bubbles make little slapping noises against my face and make little jiggling waves across the softer top side of my boobies. The louder more obnoxious noises come from air escaping the bottom, where my heavy breasts slap against the table loudly.
It's an embarrassing new talent I have that won't be making it's debut at any parties any time soon. It makes me feel overly vulnerable. Even writing about it here is making me blush, but, who else would I tell? Where else would I talk about it? These are the kind of odd things that macromastia brings that I don't hear any other girls on Instagram talk about. Lol.
My partner calls them my boob farts, which I find to be an unpleasant, if kinda accurate name. I prefer boob raspberries, but a couple times a week I end up doing this since it feels nice, and I think weirdly, it makes me feel naughty. Like, not only should I not be making these odd sounds with my breasts, but the fact that they've even grown big enough that it's possible is absurd and shouldn't be.
Boobs are supposed to be for cute, cleavage and bikinis, not covering your entire face in and making obnoxious noises your partner can hear from two rooms away 🫣, but this is one of the predicaments I find myself in. Dissociating into my breasts 😐
So how do I feel about my boobs? Kinda love hate relationship so far? This is probably the kind of journal entry I could update endlessly, and might.
Thx for reading. Love y'all 🙈
Comments
Sam Antha
"On my good boob days I'm actually so happy. I find my hands barely leave them all day, absent-mindedly jiggling and massaging them. They make me feel confident" We need to make every day a Good Boob Day! The Face / Boob pillow must be fun. I recall seeing someone take a straw once, put the straw deep into their cleavage and then while blowing into the straw using their hands to press their boobs together and to play a christmas song, jingle bells... jingle boobs?
James Law
The odd goofy things are the funnest things to share about. I’m definitely not judging, it’s just a fun way to play with them that isn’t sexual at all. really appreciate you sharing them. Your words create rich imagery that no other boob content comes close to achieving. Keep up the goofiness 👍 hope u get some more ideas
Thomas Lang
I would love to hug you tight and see them pressed all the way around your back.
Plush
I think I'm going to call it boob snorkeling from now on 🤣
Plush
That's a great idea! Will do
Amir N.
Very cool. You should start an FAQ! I’d hate to ask questions you already answered.
John Smith
Probably not what you were expecting but how’s your skin holding up with all this growth? I’d be shocked if there were no stretch marks given how fast you’ve grown.
Greedi
Thank you so much for sharing the boob raspberries with us and your experiences overall. One of the most amazing things I've ever read. Definitely brightened up my day.
William
Everything else about your post aside, please make your partner stop calling them 'your boob farts'. Make a poll as a petition. Threaten him with a good time. Something else, idk. Not a name you give something that hot lol
Plush
Maybe sometime soon. I'll explore only positive aspects in a post. If y'all are interested
Plush
I think boob snorkeling is the winner 🤣🙈
Sam
More to add. I found this post to be surprising and uplifting. My interest in growing boobs hasn't much explored some of the positive feelings you express here, so seeing another side of its, your, reality -- a side where you feel genuinely confident, beautiful, and special (Which, by the way, I believe you are those things and wish for you to feel those ways.), where you find comfort and beauty in your body and appreciate its magnificence ... that makes me feel hopeful and grounded. But like most things in life, it is not all good nor bad. And that tension, that range is itself beautiful and necessary. You demonstrate remarkable lucidity and self-awareness in your writing, and it's a wonderful thing to find myself pleasantly surprised as I have reading this, so thanks again for sharing your journey. And finally, may I suggest boob snorkeling as a name for this activity?
Yojimbo06
Great comment and opinion
Sam
Incredible post and beautifully written. Thanks for sharing. Here's to more good boob days. Glad they can bring you comfort!
Plush
Any questions you wanna ask?
John Smith
Happy to read about the happy side of this equation. It’s comforting to know that there is a good side to all of this. There’s still so many questions that could be asked, but overall, just happy to hear you have had a good day and that your boobs are good to you.
Yojimbo06
Good boob days and bad boob days; terms I didn't think I would see to be honest, but I totally get it. Just remember whether you love or hate them that day, your feelings are valid. The boob raspberry is hilarious by the way, I'd be laughing my ass off, and I'm glad you can find some amusement in the situation too, it's always healthy to laugh.
Mr. E
Aren't boobs for whatever you want them to be?
Nik
You'll always find goods and bads with your body, no matter who you are. If you can at least periodically smile at the bads, you're doing alright.
Zolani Salami
Love the honesty. I look forward to hearing more of your inner thoughts and experiences.
