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Chapter 193: Still a Funny Egg-Head
🕑 Added 2025-06-18 15:46:09 +0000 UTC
"Oh, shit! Why are you green? Wait—are you an alien?!"
Fury’s eyes widened in shock. He never imagined that the new guy—Phil Coulson—was actually an alien.
What the hell was going on? How was this even possible?
And what's more shocking, this alien matched the description that woman gave earlier—just like a variant in his memory... a shapeshifter.
"Wait a minute... You're an alien, and you know about Kamar-Taj?" Fury suddenly caught onto something, frowning in disbelief. "Isn’t Asgard and Kamar-Taj supposed to be the guardians of Earth? Are you even human?"
The Skrull blinked in confusion. What was wrong with this Earthling?
The reason Earth, despite being filled with countless low-level civilizations, hadn’t been overrun by high-level ones wasn’t just because of its remote location—though that was part of it.
The real reason was simple: Earth was under the protection of Asgard, and beings like the Ancient One stood as its guardians.
Aliens weren’t stupid. Even if some were, they were usually manipulated or brainwashed. No one in their right mind would pick a fight with Asgard or Kamar-Taj just to mess with Earth. That’s why the planet had remained relatively peaceful and undisturbed up until now.
But this guy—Fury? He didn’t even seem to know about his own planet’s protectors.
Honestly, Fury was completely lost. Asgard? Kamar-Taj? What the hell were those?
“Alright, stop wasting your breath on this idiot,” Noah finally interrupted, glancing at the Skrull. “Even if he did know, I’d have to erase his memory. Actually—yeah, I’m going to erase it anyway.”
“What?! You’re going to erase my memory?” Fury shouted, outraged. But no one seemed to care.
“It seems you’ve been staying hidden all this time,” the Skrull turned toward Noah and Wong with an apologetic expression. “Sorry we had to reveal ourselves because of your presence.”
“Tell me your purpose for being here, Skrull,” Noah asked coldly. He wasn’t interested in playing games. He already knew, but Wong didn’t.
“Apologies,” the Skrull said after a moment's hesitation. “We came here looking for someone. Some of our people are stationed near Earth... We’re searching for a new home.”
“Oh! I remember now!” Wong suddenly interrupted. “Noah, I once heard Master mention that a group of aliens entered the solar system. But Asgard allowed them in to avoid outside attention. Could they be referring to these Skrulls?”
Noah looked at Wong strangely—he hadn’t heard about that. But thinking it through, it made sense. There was no way Master Ancient One wouldn’t have noticed their arrival.
And the Skrulls didn’t seem particularly powerful individually. Perhaps the Ancient One and Asgard just saw them as harmless refugees?
If they posed no real threat, then maybe both factions simply pretended not to notice them.
And now, with another group showing up—and a certain Captain Marvel whose origins were unclear (was she Earthling? Kree?)—it was enough to attract the Ancient One’s attention.
“Huh. Didn’t expect you guys to be interstellar refugees,” Noah muttered.
“You’re spot on,” the Skrull said with a bitter smile. “That’s exactly what we are.”
“In that case, take me to the Kree you mentioned.”
“Of course—but she’s not exactly a Kree. Her memory is... confused.”
Of course it was. After absorbing so much energy from the Space Stone, and being brainwashed by the Supreme Intelligence, she didn’t even know she was originally human.
Shaking his head, Noah snapped his fingers, and the space around them instantly cracked and shifted.
When everything calmed down, Fury found himself still standing outside the Blockbuster store. Coulson, the supposed alien, was walking out as if nothing happened.
Fury rubbed his aching back. The pain at least confirmed this wasn’t a dream. But it sure felt like an illusion.
“I think you should change back into a human. You’re too ugly like this,” Noah said bluntly, glancing at Coulson, who looked ready to draw his gun. “What’s your name, by the way?”
“Vida.”
Vida nodded and quickly transformed into a middle-aged man. “You call me ugly based on human aesthetic standards. I don’t think I look bad.”
“What the hell is this?!” Coulson’s eyes widened. It was the first time he’d seen something so terrifying.
Noah didn’t bother explaining. He casually hopped into the car nearby.
Fury, still mentally scrambled, didn’t say much. He was too busy wondering when his memory would be wiped.
His entire worldview had been shattered.
There really were other lifeforms out there in the universe. As a top SHIELD agent, Fury already knew some things—but he never expected aliens to be this close.
And worst of all? They were refugees. Refugees! Hiding right near Earth.
The world was going insane. Mutants were popping up everywhere. Now there were magicians, too?
And Earth was under the protection of Asgard—a place he thought only existed in Norse myths?
His brain couldn’t handle this anymore. He felt like a kindergartener in a physics lecture.
With a head full of chaos, Fury got into the driver’s seat. Coulson joined silently, equally confused.
In the back, Noah, Wong, and Vida were already bickering.
“Damn it, Wong, you really need to lose weight! And you, Vida—why not sit in the front? This back seat is meant for two, not three. You’re squashing me!”
“Hey, I’m not fat—I’m strong. You’re just skinny, so you’ll be fine.”
“I wanted to sit up front, but Coulson’s already there! Unless you want me to kick him out?”
Fury stared at the dashboard silently, resisting the urge to strangle everyone. Non-humans, every last one of them.
With a deep sigh, he started the engine. Then paused.
“Wait... where the hell are we going?”
Everyone fell silent.
Noah blinked. “...Right. Where are we going?”
He recalled that Captain Marvel had retrieved her memory crystal while chasing a Skrull and ended up at a place called Pancho Bar—somewhere in California. But the exact location? He couldn’t remember.
Suddenly, a memory clicked. Another Skrull had been posing as Fury’s boss. And Carol Danvers (Captain Marvel) had stolen a motorcycle and ended up finding the bar first. Fury had tracked her there to get the drop on her.
After thinking hard, Noah turned to Vida. “Do you know where she is?”
“If our signals were received, she might be at Pancho Bar.”
“Where exactly is that?”
“I don’t know. I’m not from Earth.”
Noah scratched his head, then turned toward Fury. “Do you know?”
“There are bars like that all over. How should I know?” Fury replied, frustrated. “We could go back and check SHIELD’s files.”
“Sounds good,” Noah said without hesitation. “Let’s go to SHIELD.”
Fury was stunned again. That easy?
Sure, even if they took him to SHIELD, it wasn’t like they could do anything to him... but the way Noah agreed was unsettling.
What confused Fury even more—he hadn’t even said he was with SHIELD. How did this guy know?
Could it be... he was familiar with SHIELD?
Or worse—he knew someone inside?
Noah smirked at the rearview mirror, catching the look of confusion on Fury’s face. “What? Surprised I know about SHIELD?”
“Uh... yeah, kind of,” Fury muttered, unsure how to respond.
“Well, I do know a few people—like Pym Hank, the ex-SHIELD scientist. And Rickard, who I believe hasn’t officially resigned.”
Fury’s eyes widened. “You know them?”
“Of course. I even asked them for help. But they can’t say anything now. One’s under a gag order, and the other had his memory wiped.”
“You’re not afraid I’ll bring them in for questioning?”
“Be my guest. But that’s only if you still remember any of this when it’s over.”
“...”
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