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Chapter 83 - The Accusation

🕑 Added 2024-11-25 21:52:09 +0000 UTC

Comments

Danielle Warvel

No, I’ll have to try it. I will say, that I had ocd until I turned 25, and as much as I loved Monk, it just hit WAY too close to home to ever finish watching. It was less second hand embarrassment and more being given a third person viewing of myself that made me nearly spontaneously combust in belated nuclear reactor meltdown levels of mortification, but I absolutely fell in love with mystery book series called the Isaac Taylor Mysteries where the main character had clairvoyant abilities with side effects very similar to hyperesthesia and was basically a cooler male version of me in demeanor, body language, quirks, and strangely enough, even physical traits, so it’s a fifty fifty chance that I either hate-love it too much to endure, or just love it to pieces. Though, the premise does have a point. I know that the perfume industry will pay people who are super smellers or who have hyperesthesia a crap ton of money to become perfume testers, though that’s really more hazard pay if you ask me, since that would be the suckiest job imaginable to anyone who had those traits. Bribing them with a ridiculous amount of money is probably the only way they can get them to agree, because I certainly wouldn’t unless I was completely desperate for money and zero other job prospects.

Timothy Nugent

Did you ever see the TV show from the 90s named "The Sentinel"? It was about a cop that developed super human senses. Kind of reminds me of your life.

Danielle Warvel

Exactly. Don’t even get me started on my one and only experience trying to wear perfume (Odur rotting flowers, never again), and I can’t even get within two feet of a glass of alcohol because of the horrible smell of poison wafting off of it, but on the other hand, I don’t have to worry about ever developing alcoholism because it forces me to be a teetotaler, and I have never gotten food poisoning or even gotten a bad stomachache from accidentally eating bad food, because I can detect when something it ABOUT to go bad. Not when it’s bad, but is a day or two away from that point, and I always end up stopping and spitting it out, some instinct not letting me swallow it, no matter how faint that ‘not quite right’ stale taste is. I’ve never been wrong, so I’m in charge of disposing of leftovers in the fridge. My family has learned better than to gainsay me when I make the call to throw something out. I never got covid and I’ve only actually been sick with a cold or virus once or twice in my life, and ironically enough, that was after being given the flu shot. I suspect part of that is because I can’t eat junk food because all of the artificial chemicals and preventatives taste revolting to me. One the other hand, I can’t do concerts or big crowds because I will get completely overloaded, and sometimes even the wind will just get to be too much, making it feel like I’m being scitched at with a thousand little sandpaper claws, and I just wig out and am suddenly done with the day because it feel like the world is actively beaming down hate on me. It’s Very much a mixed bag. P.S. John Doe, not sure where you meant by that, and I’m sure it was intended to be a interesting or helpful resource, but unfortunately the link doesn’t seem to lead to an actual article (maybe because you have to pay for access?). Thanks anyway. I always appreciate an opportunity to learn more.

John Doe

Stress and anxiety detection using facial cues from videos. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1746809416300805 Facial Stress Analysis: Facial stress analysis is a non-invasive and non-contact method for detecting and measuring stress levels based on facial cues. It involves analyzing facial expressions, muscle movements, and other physiological signals to infer an individual’s emotional state, particularly stress. Key Findings Facial Action Coding System (FACS): Researchers have used FACS to identify specific facial actions (e.g., AU1, AU6, AU12, AU15) associated with stress, sadness, and disgust, achieving an accuracy of 93.21% (Table 4) and 88.41% (Table 3) in predicting stress levels. Automated Facial Analysis: Studies have employed computer vision and machine learning techniques to automatically extract facial features, such as eye-related events, mouth activity, head motion parameters, and heart rate estimated through camera-based photoplethysmography, to detect stress and anxiety (e.g., [1], [2]).

Timothy Nugent

That's either a superpower or a curse, depending on the situation.

Danielle Warvel

I probably would be too in different circumstances, since I’m actually not great at reading facial expressions and always have my head in a book (yes, even while walking, on occasion), but hyperesthesia makes it so I not only can sense more (I can hear dog whistles in excruciating definition, and taste the individual chemicals that make up artificial flavors, or smell perfumes break down), but I don’t filter out sensory input as well as other people. I don’t really have the ability to tune it out or ignore it like other people do. Which is extremely aggravating and even painful at times, but I have to admit that it comes with its upsides. For example, I was once sitting on my living room floor reading from my kindle next to the tv, and suddenly picked up a DVD case, slammed it back down, and then smooshed it around on the floor while still reading. I didn’t even register what I was doing until I finished reading the paragraph, then turned to stare at my hand still on the dvd case like it was some foreign being or taken over by an alien or something, stunned and utterly baffled by its sudden decision to act independently of me. Something kind of niggled at me, and following that intuition, I lifted the dvd case, only to find the crushed remains of a scorpion under it. My best guess it that it must have crawled out from under the couch on the far edges of my peripheral vision, and I subconsciously registered the movement as a threat and reacted to it before my conscious mind, still focused on the contents of the book, could even begin to shift its focus enough to address the problem. It was simultaneously weird and cool at the same time, because until that point I thought I was pretty oblivious while reading, but it turns out I was paying more attention than I thought, I just had never picked up anything that posed a large enough threat to make that evident. The human brain is an amazing thing, even even it’s kind of disfunctional.

Timothy Nugent

That's crazy impressive. My wife says I am oblivious to everything.

Danielle Warvel

I’m the same way. I have hyperesthesia (hyper acute senses), and I often hear things other people don’t seem to be able to, and even I don’t always notice consciously until shortly after I’ve already reacted to it. People harboring true aggression or malice towards always raise red flags for me as soon as they open their mouths. There’s this…note, or tone or something I can’t really properly describe, hidden underneath the innocuous one they are trying to use to hide their intentions that makes me tense up and my hair stand on end like I’m being confronted by a snake hissing quietly in the nearby brushes. And one time, I heard something either in the far, far distance while out walking to a local store at night, or so soft and distorted by the surrounding buildings that I still don’t know what exactly it was I heard, and didn’t consciously register until later, but I suddenly felt this sense of doom and intense dread, and immediately turned around and went back home on instinct with no clue why I was doing so. I just very distinctly remember suddenly not liking the look of the surroundings shadows, thinking ‘NOPE’, doing a sudden about face on the spot, and marching back the way I came with the back of my neck crawling the entire way. I learned later there was a shooting only 10-15 minutes later in the parking lot of the store I had been heading to. At the pace I had been walking I probably would have arrived just in time to become involved.

Timothy Nugent

Very developed instincts. Most of us suppress them. My wife met an aquanitence of mine back at college when we were dating. (I was not friends with him, but did occasionally talk as he was in the same classes) She told me to stay far, far away from him. I said, 'okay...' A year later, the FBI showed up to the college and arrested him for making terrorist threats. This was back in 2004, shortly after 9-11.

Danielle Warvel

Exactly. Social acceptance means nothing before self preservation, especially when your 5’2 and 112 pounds soaking wet, with little thin wrist and ankle bones any guy or hefty enough girl could wrap their hands around and snap like a chicken wing without much effort (I’m 29 and still wear kid sized bracelets). If I get toxic or bad vibes from someone, or something about someone just pings me the wrong way, I listen to my instincts immediately, and I’m out of there like my ass is on fire. I have never seen any kind of school fight or just shooting or anything, but I’ve had confirmed by multiple people that I’ve managed to just barely avoid plenty of them. Each time I sensed something in the air and instinctively changed course and headed the exact opposite direction right before violence erupted without even noticing what I was doing until I was already clear and i hear the shouts and screeches or whatever break out behind me where I just came from in right before I got out of hearing range. I was never one of those idiots who sensed a cat or knife or fist fight, stuck around to watch, and then got caught in the subsequent brawl that erupted when it got out of hand. Heard plenty of the stories. Managed to avoid ever becoming one of the unfortunate characters in one. I also carried a stun gun throughout highschool I wasn’t supposed to have on campus (retarded rule, fyi) , with my dad’s permission, and no one else ever learned I had it because I never said a word about it to anyone else or ever had to take it out of its concealed pocket in my bag.

John Doe

:-) "Have you never had a friend group that included someone you really didn't like, but continued to hang with them because it would be awkward not to?" Personally, I am a cold MF, who grew up in a "harsh" Eastern United States urban area before adulthood. These days, the kids call it Ghosting. Back then, I would change my phone number, and "drop a dime" on dangerous former friends to get them arrested (alternatively, you could tell their competing drug dealers where they slept at night). I called it cauterizing the relationship. :-) Any "friend" who has an unstable personality is a potential future threat to my survival. Where I grew up, no one sane tolerated threats to their survival. Heh! :-) It is a form of Risk Management. I am retired and still alive. I doubt my cauterized former associates survived. :-)

Danielle Warvel

But again, why would anyone be friends or even hang around with an inconsiderate ass? You shouldn’t hang around toxic influences like that. Their attitudes tend to act like a poison. If they are somewhat borderline, and seem to exhibit at least some remorse after the fact, then a real friend then you owe it to them to tell them straight up whenever they’re going over the line. And if you intended to just portray Rajesh as an extremely inconsiderate ass, I think you overshot your mark by…well, a lot. Right from the beginning he gave off borderline evil mastermind with a god complex/scumbag/serial killer tyrant to be vibes. That’s why so many alpha readers here have been hypothesizing all these really horrible, ‘try to take over the settlement’ to ‘taking it for all it can offer and leaving it to burn’ level of catastrophic betrayals all this time. I’ve read about serial killer’s or demon lords out to destroy the world that were more empathetic and personable. And the more Blakes describes future Rajesh, the less sense any of this makes. None of his words ever really portray him in a noticeably better light. I’m just not seeing the logic or even an emotion based motive that makes sense here. If we had seen Rajesh act even slightly tolerable for a single second it would be a lot easier to emphasize with Blake’s unwillingness to accept the reality that his actual friends that he made had been killed and left behind in an erased future, and this might have worked a lot better.

Timothy Nugent

I mean, if I feared for my own safety, I would obviously refuse as well, but that was not the case with Rajesh. The dude is just an inconsiderate ass. I have had multiple, 'friends' that behaved the same, although, not quote to Rajesh's extreme. Don't forget, so far we have only heard Montgomery's side.

Danielle Warvel

Actually, no. If I met someone I was certain was a sociopath or a narcissist I would stay well clear, and tell my friends in no uncertain terms that not only should they do the same, no just not to bother inviting me to any group thing that person was attending. I value my own safety and sanity too much to expose myself to someone like that and risk being targeted by their schemes and gaslighting. I’ve read the studies and the horror stories. Just hard Nope on out of there. I don’t believe peer pressure is a thing so I’ve never felt any inclination to be friends with anyone dumb enough to tolerate legit narcissist behavior either, so….that sounds like an other people problem.

Timothy Nugent

Have you never had a friend group that included someone you really didn't like, but continued to hang with them because it would be awkward not to? Also, remember, Blake didn't meet Rajesh until the man had spent 2 years in the Apocalypse. He was forced to tone himself down and developed some empathy, or he would have been left behind or exiled. He is far more brutal now than when Blake knew him, and Blake has not spent much time with the younger Rajesh. Most of his time is spent solo in scenarios.

John Doe

No matter what Montgomery or Rajesh's statements/opinions are, there is an inescapable reality/self-solution to this mess. 1. Leave Rajesh in the cell until after the apocalypse begins, then let him out. If he lives long enough to escape the mob and make it off of the complex before then, self interest/survival would force him to go to the authorities for protection. This is a security risk that must not be allowed. 2. Let Rajesh out of his cell now. Both Blake and Rajesh have to sleep sometime. No matter where Rajesh goes, someone will follow him and kill him in his sleep. No one (except Blake or his mother) will raise a hand to defend Rajesh. Either way, the problem solves itself. I gotta' say, Blake and his parent's passivity, morality (look at how they "trust" Blake's brother) and Kumbaya approach to social management is going to tear their community apart. One can not politically run a post apocalyptic community using ineffective pre-apocalyptic U.S. justice system rules/laws/concepts. Blake and his parents appear to have naive/passive, self destructive pacifist notions of Justice and "Fair" treatment of people in their community. This is evidenced by the way they raised and treat Blake's brother and the fact that they plan to passively kill Jerome after the apocalypse by kicking him out of the community at that time. That is just plain moral cowardice. Instead of executing Jerome now, they want to keep their hands and their consciences clean by letting "Nature" kill/execute Jerome for them later. The passive (or permissive) way that they deal with Jerome and the brother (and now Rajesh) may seem to be different modalities, but they are in fact the same failure to deal with problems "head on". *sigh* The path to Hell is paved with good intentions. :-)

Danielle Warvel

No, but seriously, how, because all that does is make is doubt the main character’s intelligence and discernment.

Undead Writer

I hate the fact that the MC doesn’t even think for a moment that he doesn’t know his former friends. Rajesh is not your friend. He is not helpful. Sure he can get you nano, but that’s his only use! He is disliked by everyone, is not the greatest fighter, and causes far, far too much turmoil within the group. Honestly, this is the worst part of the story right now. That fact that she died and the MC is not going to kill Rajesh because of his fake image of his friends is just a weak point to the story. I get he’s been blinded by his past friendship with them. But he is not with them. The only reason they survived was because HE was apart of the group. Without him the group was going to be slaughtered. I’m pissed that the MC doesn’t even seem distraught that the young woman who had a far brighter future in the story was killed off. He doesn’t even bat at eye at her death, but struggles with killing Rajesh.

Undead Writer

I guess the author just needed someone to hate? Someone everyone will be super glad to see finally die like the pathetic A hole he is?

Danielle Warvel

Wow, great start there Rajesh, what with the first words out of your mouth being the most idiotically presumptuous, arrogant statement you could have possibly made. Okay, serious question. Blake Just told us that he’s never shown remorse for anything as long as he knew him, so how could Blake, or anyone for that matter, ever come to consider Rajesh a friend in ANY timeline? He’s clearly sociopathic, has full on narcissistic personality disorder, or a little of both, so just HOW?

John Anastacio

Yeah Blake was being an extremely optimistic dumbass when he made them team up. If this story were darker and if Blake had a darker more sadistic personality, he could have fun threatening Rajesh and/or letting the others actually lynch him, and let them all see the consequences of their actions and wishes. After the apocalypse starts for real, everyone is going to be killing other humans anyway, so why not get an early start? Then again, Blake would have to see the consequences of his own actions, and he isn't there yet.

Undead Writer

If Rajesh don’t die, this story dumb

Jamison Schneider

Yup, two fundamentally different groups of people who could never be made to be the same and he tried to make them be the same, Blake is the one most responsible here.

Corwin

Lol that last line is the best to end that chapter on

John Anastacio

Sigh. Everyone except maybe Jeff is being way too emotional. Worst of all is Blake went into this with way too many preconceptions about his friends. They never should have been made to team up in the first place.


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