RodVonBoche
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Disintegrity 24 remake !
🕑 Added 2020-02-25 03:30:49 +0000 UTCSince it's in order, I added it in the HD folder :
So. Things changed. I usually always start these change logs by saying "I had to redo everythang" cos that's almost true. Almost. But in reality there's always some tiny stuff that survives, like the speech bubbles or the background or the lines for the panels... Well, here, nothing remains. Nothing.Despite that it's not like it's the most changed page of them all !
So, let's get through the stuff : Panel 1 is very different because the old one is just weird (and looked bad, Larsen's pose seems senseless and he looks tiny). The point was just to show a pause in Larsen's momentum but it wasn't really felt (I think). The panel just looks too conventional, the sideview angle seems more apt to show the action than really imply a pause.
So I pulled the camera back, it's like the action is taking a step back. I'd like to think that the relative length of the panel makes it seem like what it depicts also take longer. Also the blank space all around and general straight-ness of the rectangle are there to make things seem calmer, especially calmer than the more jagged panels of the previous page. Small panel, big changes.
Panel 2 and 3 are mostly the same, the angle are just a bit different. Again, a little more blank black space around the panel to make it look more calm. More importantly, the text changed ! In retrospect I'm not sure what I wrote back then came through properly. Especially since, reading the page to redo it, I had no clue what I really meant. So I figure I should change it and instead of implying that Zee always wanted to be on friendlier terms with Larsen, I thought that Zee's should be more straightforward and call back to their earlier conversation wherein Zee never actually reciprocated out loud the feelings he stated Larsen to have (altho he did kiss him so I guess it wasn't that needed but whatever).
That's a convoluted sentence but you get what I mean.
Okay it's super late bye
Comments
Eldkatten
Wow, just wow! The dialog was weird, I agree, but now it's natural and clear. The 'total' view in the first panel is a brilliant idea. That is one excellent piece of (re-)work!
tegirvaru
awwwww, the last panel, dumb cute zee. larsen O.O
