RodVonBoche
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Disintegrity 25 / 50 / 112 remade !
🕑 Added 2019-08-11 02:29:31 +0000 UTCYes, three pages ! But 112 is kind of a cheat, even tho it still took me longer to do than it needed to.
Lets go over the changes right quick :
P 25 : There isn't much to be said except that the big middle panel somehow has a weirder pose now. I mostly changed it by accident, trying to fix the original pose didn't look right so I raised the head in front of the hand rather than beneath and there we are. But I'm fine with it, I can explain it away by just saying "well he's distraught, why would he have a good sensible posture ?!"
It does make him look brighter as well tho. But whateeeever it's fiiiine...
P 50 : Changes are more substantial on this one. More fun to talk about too.
First panel sees the angle and shadowiness of Zee change. I'm not sure it was right to change the angle, the original made it look more like a sudden interruption, but the shading is an improvement. Was the TV's blue so strong it darkened his face so much ? I don't think so, past me, you fucking buffoon. Nothing special all in all.
Larsen's expression on the next panel was whanged a bit to be more "hwat ?!". It's more fun, his irises are less blown open and thus don't look like they comprise the entire bloody eye, finally Zee's magic wang looks like an adequate tool to expellianus. Or something. Look it's 4 am I can't right now ok.
Third panel sees another expression change with Zee now looking less confident yet more excited. What doesn't change is the magic trick he pulls off, which is to say his pants that somehow were fitting both legs in the previous panel yet somehow slip off one in this one. Just don't think about the logistics of that, trust me, it's possible somehow despite Larsen being in between his legs.
It's basically the same story in the next panel, just more to be gleaned from how Zee looks. Spoiler's, he's excited.
Not much ot say about the last panel except two things; a small dialogue change which I find funnier than the original. Going from "shit he's naked" to "fuck he's too naked". (specaking of fuck instead of shit, I also modified page 51 to have "fucks" instead of "shits" as was suggested by Matt I believe cos yeah, even if smoke "shits" were in continuity with the previous "shit he's naked", I do end up agreeing that it's best not to leave any confusion about shit when butt is in full frame, Fuck is okay, the butt is here for that.)
Secondly, it's not about a change but rather about a non change. I often dezoom the panels here and there cos I felt like the original were too zoomed in. Well this is one where I didn't unzoom that much and yet might have done too much. I feel like the panel being so zoomed in makes it feels as cramped as Larsen feels while Zee passes over him so it's one instance where there's nothing to gain from dezooming, even Zee is sexy and his ass was look fine while I was sketching it. But it's doubly unecessary to unzoom because iot makes the reveal of the following page more satisfying, especially now that P.51 does look good.
P 112 : Yeah well, I guess it's pretty self explanatory. I just added some body language in there to add to the dialogue but yeah. It's just Zee floof and Larsen limbs.
OKAY Anyway it's late. I'll just mention now that I've got two comic page and a normal picture comished by someone to try to do before friday (which is vacation time) so it's likely I'll have nothing to show this week, nor the following one. Ye've been warned.
Comments
RodVonBoche
As far as I can tell, the likes mean absolutely nothing on patreon if you're a nsfw content creator. Your stuff won't show up anywhere.
Eldkatten
Where is everyone? Can't imagine only 2 likes in 2 days.
RodVonBoche
Yeah, you noticed a lot of mistakes that slipped me by, the v shaped lines, the pants beings closed. I ain't gonna fix any of it tho !
Eldkatten
This is sooo great! Thank you! Just a few comments: Page 25 5th panel: I like the black ink being washed down into the picture by the rain, and the much clearer face of Larsen's which shows a more complex expression. Page 50 2nd panel: Yes, Larsen's face expression is much more consistent now. Page 50 3rd panel: I really like excited Zee, also in the next panel :-) You're right about the pants trick, but maybe you can fix that in the remake of page 49 ;-) May I point out that Zee's pants seem to be still buttoned, which is consistent with page 48 (and 49), but makes the "trick" even more difficult. And d'accord about the shit-fuck-change, and thanks for mentioning page 51 again, I missed the change then and still had the "shit"-version. No pun intended. Though I'm often not comfortable with too much zoom - because I have problems with sorting out the details - I already was fine with this one even in the old version. Glad you kept it. And a plus is Zee's left leg now visible while he is crawling over Larsen, which makes the movement more natural and interesting. (P.S.: I notice now that Zee's leg was visible in the old version, too, but only as a black shadow and not really recognizable. For me, at least. Thanks for changing the lighting.) And a question: Page 112 2nd panel, upper right: what are those v-shaped lines? They weren't there in the old version, and aren't there in any of the other panels.
