RodVonBoche
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Disintegrity 8 remade !
🕑 Added 2019-07-31 01:02:45 +0000 UTCSorry for the wait, I've gotten a two comic page comish to work on so I might be even slower in the future. It do be like that. I wish I could just work on my own stuff full time but I'm not there yet sadly.
Moving on ! Page 8 isn't a vital page of the comic but the comic needed some example of Larsen being a cruel dickhead so that's why it's there. Had I known the comic would clock up to 120 pages long, I'd probably have added more in that vein, just todrive the point home. Yet back then I still had an estimation of around 40 pages, the comic balloooned cos I really liked these characters even if in retrospect I couldn't draw them with any consistency.
Anywa, panel 1 ! Probably the biggest improvement in the remake. I'm not sure how well the original conveys that Larsen snatches the bag off Zee's hands but I feel it's certainly more obvious in the new one ? At least Zee's hand is near the bag. Beside that, Larsen's expression is both changed and more visible. In the original his face was just stoic. I guess it could hint as to how mundane his bullying is but I like having him look more twisted as he berates Zee.
Panel 2 is hardly worth mentionning, although I should have draw a bunch of Zee's hair above the speech bubble. But oh well.
Panel 3 is also the very definition of an "oh well' panel. I don't think the old one looks good. I don't think the new one looks good either. But I don't care enough to fix it. So there it is.
Panel 4 had some issues, Zee's pose made him look incredibly awkward and the linework on Larsen alternated between thick and ultra fucking thick for some reason. So I try to make Zee's reaching pose more natural (his left hand seems too small but again : "oh well !") and Larsen's linework is redefined. Redone, really. There's not a single line that remains of the old page anywhere in sight.
The only thing worth noting in Panel 5 is that I moved it closer to panel 4 for readibility' sake.
Which is also why panel 6 is now detached from panel 4, because why was it attached to it in the first place ?! It was an invitation to read it all in the wrong order. Very stupid layout that crops up a bunch in Disintegrity, it's not the first one I fix in this remastering process. Beside that, I really liked Zee's expression on the last panel in the old page. I some ways I still prefer it to the new page if I'm being honest, but oh well !
Okay bye
Comments
RodVonBoche
Yeah, she's human.
Eldkatten
Gasp! I just found out: Danielle has no tail :-o
Eldkatten
Just reread the description, and one thing comes to mind (in addition to what I said already): Panel 3 is splendid!
Yesterday I had a dream and Larsen and Zee were there.
Eldkatten
I do like this remake. I didn't like the old version very much, but for the scene (Larsen snatching Zee's bag and throw it onto a nearby roof, I didn't see that coming). Both the poses and facial expressions are much improved. Yes, Zee's left hand has come out too small in panel 4, but I agree to "Oh, well". But actually, in my opinion, about everything in this remade page is clearer and more interesting than in the old version. I wasn't so keen about Zee's expression in the last, the "Aaaaw"-panel, though it was kind of adorable. The new one is much improved. I allways had the impression that Zee has serious clothes-problems on that page (or rather the artist had drawing them ;-) ), adding to that anatomically awkward left arm of his in panel 4. All in all it looked as if Zee stands with his back towards Larsen, his head twisted all around to the back, and his arms dislocated at the shoulders or elbows and twisted again. Not to mention the eyes ;-) I'm very glad about that fixed properly. Finally, in comparison the movements looked more like freeze images in the old version, while there is much more dynamic in the new one. Great work! :-D
