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PftA Book 3 - Chapter 40 - Familiar Faces on an Unfamiliar Floor

🕑 Added 2024-06-24 21:28:45 +0000 UTC

Comments

Procrastination

Thanks for pointing that out! I'm doing edits right now, so your recommendations are very timely and welcome :)

Jennifer Leigh

I think this should be Ava? "Zavira barked out a laugh. “No wonder you were so quick to look into the Trials! That is an excellent reward!”

Anne-Marie Mills

In reference to her parents choosing not to move to Hadier, Emily thinks, "I was fairly confident they would change their mind eventually." Shouldn't that be plural: "...change their minds..."?

SpiraSpira

Yeah, I kind of expected one or all of them to make the implication they might take over their home nation or something, maybe if only to prevent an alien noble from running it.

Adurna

It felt thin most of all. Like the last segment might benefit from a few more remarks and comments. Like if the other Earthborn might want to start their own home faction or something.


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