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Chapter 354 – Taste My Dog Food!
🕑 Added 2025-10-02 16:29:52 +0000 UTC‘Keqing, shocked for a hundred years!!!’
As one of Liyue’s Qixing, Miss Yuheng had far more life experience than most girls her age.
Up to this point, Keqing had met all kinds of people, lived through all sorts of bizarre situations, and could proudly claim to have seen it all.
Or so she thought.
Because this—this, she really had never seen before.
Staring at the suddenly transformed Venti—who, after a sip of alcohol, had become a beautiful young woman—Keqing’s violet eyes widened in disbelief.
The little strand of hair on her head swayed as if to broadcast her shock.
To be honest, Venti’s delicate, fair features were already deceptive enough.
To strangers, he could easily be mistaken for a girl at first glance.
But now, after becoming “Miss Venti,” her exposed skin was even softer, whiter, glowing flawlessly under the sunlight with a faint rosy hue unique to young women.
Below her graceful collarbone was a full and curving chest, paired with a slim waist that her clothing outlined perfectly.
“W-what… what the heck is this?”
Keqing scratched her head like a confused kitten, watching Venti not only change genders on the spot but also start pouring down drinks as if nothing happened.
Zhongli blinked, carefully studying Venti.
Surprise flickered across his face before turning into suspicion.
As an old friend, Zhongli understood very well what Venti’s youthful, boyish appearance meant for Barbatos.
Seeing him suddenly change his appearance was unexpected.
But then, looking at the despairing expression of “Miss Venti,” who was now chugging wine with a deadpan look…
Things clearly weren’t what he first thought.
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[Ehehe, not bad, not bad at all—Miss Venti is really cute~]
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The golden-haired girl now smiled innocently, her face brimming with mischievous charm.
Her cuteness was undeniable, though the vibe she gave off was… adorably dumb.
But for Nagami, who shared thoughts with Lumine, this was just proof: Yeah, Lumine’s completely hopeless.
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[Hey, hey, my other self—what do you say we splash Zhongli with some enchanted water? I bet the result would blow our minds!]
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Lumine’s excitement was tinged with mischief. She’d entertained the idea before, but never followed through.
Not out of respect for the Geo Archon, no—she just didn’t want to get beaten up.
But now? With Nagami by her side, Lumine’s confidence was soaring.
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[Please stop with the sonar pings.]
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Nagami couldn’t help snapping back, his gaze sharpening.
Sure, “Miss Zhongli” did sound amusing—but Zhongli’s stern, unyielding nature was nothing like Venti’s playful personality.
Nagami’s moral compass was wobbling dangerously close to collapse.
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[Honestly, there’s no good reason to mess with Zhongli. He and Venti can’t even be compared.]
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Just as Lumine began to mull over his words, her thoughts were cut short by the scene in front of her.
Venti tilted her head back, holding a wine bottle in both hands, guzzling it down.
Wine overflowed her lips, trailing down her soft skin before slipping into the valley of her chest.
The sudden chill made her flinch, but she barely reacted—just frowned slightly, then wiped her mouth and slammed the empty bottle on the table with a satisfied sigh.
“Ask them if you want answers.”
She gestured at Zhongli and Keqing, then cracked open another jug, filling her cup and propping her chin up with one delicate hand.
Her expression was pure dead-fish eyes as she stared across the table.
Following her gaze, Zhongli and Keqing turned their heads—only to see Lumine and Nagami whistling innocently, one looking left, the other right.
Zhongli sighed, already half-expecting this outcome.
He nodded to himself, as if making a mental note: ‘Looks like I’ll need to add this to my list of burdens. Otherwise, those two pests will just keep causing trouble.’
He didn’t know whether to call it his misfortune or his luck.
Because the truth was, Zhongli really did treat Lumine as a friend.
Among all the gods of Teyvat, he was one of the oldest.
Though a certain golden-haired “old lady” had managed to deceive Barbatos with her brilliant acting, Zhongli could still sense that faint, nearly undetectable aura around Lumine.
The aura of time.
The traveler’s years of experience were at least equal to his own—maybe even greater.
Friendship with an immortal was simple, as long as ideals didn’t directly clash.
But for an ordinary mortal to truly earn an immortal’s friendship? That was rarer than rare.
Take Venti, for instance.
If he’d made a close human friend upon waking, then gone into hibernation to preserve himself… by the time he woke again, he’d probably be visiting that friend’s grandchildren’s grave.
At moments like this, it wasn’t hard to imagine what someone might feel.
For long-lived beings, friendships held a certain weight.
That was why, whenever an immortal showed up with good intentions, people naturally wanted to befriend them.
Zhongli had never once tried to expose Lumine’s secret, nor did he speak words to hint at it—but the meaning was perfectly conveyed regardless.
That was the silent understanding among immortals.
Unlike when they had first met, Zhongli’s view of Lumine had grown… complicated.
Not regret, exactly, but she was without a doubt one of the most unusual beings he’d ever crossed paths with in millennia.
How to put it? Mischievous, yes—though perhaps more than a little over the top.
If Aether ever heard someone describe Lumine that way, he’d probably laugh himself silly.
“Come now, don’t sweat the small stuff! Eat, drink, enjoy yourselves!”
With a sweet, harmless smile plastered on her face, Lumine poured wine for everyone, trying to pass it off as if nothing strange had happened.
The banquet’s mood was warm and lively.
Keqing finally got to taste her beloved golden shrimp balls—though only from the very last plate.
Every time the first nine plates hit the table, something would happen, and by the time Keqing snapped back to her senses, the delicious shrimp balls had already been snatched up by Nagami, Lumine, or even Guoba.
Her expressions were priceless: from stunned, to horrified, to bewildered, to wronged, to teary-eyed with maximum grievance mode activated.
When the crispy-yet-tender flavor finally burst across her tongue, Lady Yuheng’s violet eyes shimmered with tears she nearly shed from sheer happiness.
Her usually cold, proud face was glowing with bliss, as if she’d fallen straight from hell into paradise.
Then, smiling like a cat who’d gotten the cream, Keqing indulged Lumine the shameless pervert by showing off her “Butt-Slash Sword Technique.”
Leaving behind the line, “If swordlight exists, it cuts through all junk,” she turned gracefully and departed to resume her afternoon work.
Lumine, meanwhile, collapsed face-first on the floor, pointing weakly with one trembling finger as though drawing a road forward.
“Well, aside from the first few hits that stung a little, the rest felt like tiny fists tapping my chest.”
Because of their shared senses, Nagami got to experience Keqing’s “massage session” himself. (Joking—mostly.)
The real Lady Yuheng was nothing like her in-game counterpart, but seeing Lumine pretending to writhe in agony made her ease up and hold back most of her strength.
Nagami slipped one arm under Lumine’s knees, the other around her shoulders, and carried her back to her seat princess-style.
“Serves you right for teasing Keqing,” Paimon said, crossing her little arms and giving Lumine a smug sideways look. “Totally brought this on yourself… uh…”
Her words froze midair.
Because the very next second, the “corpse” in Nagami’s arms suddenly sprang back to life, bouncing to her feet full of energy.
“Paimon… what did you just say? I didn’t quite catch that.”
The smile on Lumine’s face was still cute and goofy, but something in her eyes made Paimon’s eyelid twitch like mad.
A tidal wave of danger crashed down on her tiny frame.
“I-I was saying… saying that it was Keqing’s own fault she didn’t get the shrimp balls! Yeah, that’s exactly what I meant!”
Paimon shook her head frantically like a rattle drum, trembling all the while.
Satisfied, Lumine nodded, then plopped back into her seat.
One hand scooped up soup, the other lifted slices of meat straight to Nagami’s mouth.
The sight left the men around the table in stunned silence.
Several single guys slumped against the table, faces turned away, trying to avoid being force-fed this public display of affection.
Nagami, however, calmly ate the food without complaint.
His hearing was sharp enough to pick up all the whispers in the tavern, but he couldn’t be bothered to listen to random chatter.
He’d long since unlocked the achievement of “feeding strangers dog food all by myself.”
“By the way, Zhongli—”
“By the way, Traveler—mind if I join you on your next journey?”
Zhongli’s timing was impeccable.
The moment Lumine opened her mouth, he cut her off, sidestepping whatever nonsense she was about to pull and steering the situation in a safer direction.
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[Nagami]: See? I told you—once Zhongli figured out your shameless nature, there’s no way he’d give you an easy opening.
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Nagami shrugged, chewing on the pastry Lumine had offered.
He even lightly nipped her pale finger in the process.
“Of course not a problem,” Lumine replied with a smile. “We’re heading to Inazuma soon. Come along and meet some old friends.”
Nagami blew gently on the rib soup Lumine held to his lips before sipping it down.
“Burp~”
Seeing this cozy exchange, “Miss Venti” sat slumped in her seat, looking more and more sour. Her face was the picture of frustration.
‘For crying out loud! I barely ate anything, so why do I already feel stuffed to death?!’
