Kevin the Bored
patreon
188 I Just Want To Talk 2 Electric Boogaloo
🕑 Added 2023-09-27 03:57:36 +0000 UTCSomewhere in East Germany, February 22nd, 19:33.
Hidden away in the snowy forests of Eastern Germany, an impressive estate can be seen, with a lakeside mansion that is half way to being a palace, just screaming 'old money' with it's aristocratic design and well maintained greenery, still visible even under the snow covering everything in sight.
But it is clearly not some quite rich person's getaway, as the grounds are fully active, with trucks driving down a well paved road to a nearby bunker entrance, all the while unformed, armed guards patrol the grounds, each with a pair of large dogs with them on thick chains.
And in the centre of it all, sits a man in his private study. He's a well built man, standing just over six foot tall with pale skin, blond hair slicked back and piercing blue eyes and a well defined jawline.
This man is none other than Leopold von Habsburg-Lothringen, the current Herrscher of Gesellschaft and the rightful heir to the Thrones of Austria, Hungary, Bohemia, and Croatia, even if he's long since stopped caring for the titles his father threw away.
So lost in his work is he, that he does not even notice the frantic knocking on his study's door until it increases in volume, startling him from the paper he was studying.
"Enter." He says, his voice raised enough to be heard but not enough to be called shouting.
Leopold suppresses a frown as his door is bust open, reasoning that whatever they are here for must be important for them to be in such a rush, and wasting time complaining about their hurried manner would only be foolish.
"Herrscher!" The relatively skinny, brown haired boy exclaims as he stands in a poor salute.
"Yes yes, what is it that you come to me with such urgency?" Leopold asks, mildly irritated at the man's lack of composure.
"Right, Herrscher, there is a Fräulein approaching the manor!" The boy says, annoying Leopold even further with such a useless report.
"So? Capture her and find out why she was here, then execute her. I do not need to be the one to tell you how to do this, go tell your direct superior to come see me and stop wasting my time." Leopold says with a dismissive wave, returning his attention back to his work, only for the boy to not do as ordered, and to instead move closer to his desk.
"I did Herrscher, he said to bring this to you as soon as possible!" The boy exclaims as he brings a tablet forward, holding it so that Leopold can see the screen and what it shows.
And when he looks at the security camera footage of the road leading up to the estate, he suddenly understand why Konrad felt that it needed his immediate attention.
Walking up the snowy road is a single ginger haired woman, wearing a classic bar maid's outfit, with short puff sleeves on her white blouse that, in conjuration with her low cut brown bodice, only serve to accentuate her bust even as it covers it.
The front of the bodice is tied together with bright red ribbons, with each side embroidered with a heart and a few flowers. The skirt however does not cover nearly as much as the blouse, being a short skirt that doesn't even cover half of her thigh, with an even smaller, obviously decorative apron on it's front. Though her legs are not completely exposed, as she is wearing a pair of white high-socks that reach past her knee, leaving only a small gap of skin showing on the thighs.
Thanks to the sleeves not going further than the puff over her shoulders, Leopold can clearly see a number of tattoos decorating her arms, the smallest being a simple snowflake on the back of her right hand, matching with a simple flame on the opposite hand.
Then her right forearm, which, with the camera quality available, Leopold can only see as a circle with a purple, glowing man in the centre. The other forearm has what appears to be a glowing blue hand marionetting a number of flaming skulls.
The final visible tattoo being that of a crying three headed woman on her right bicep, the front facing woman wearing a neutral expression while the left's mouth tilts down and the right's up.
But more important to Leopold than any of that, is the woman's face. A face he recognises. A face that was relatively unknown to the world outside of America, until she decided to travel, gaining the unofficial title of the 'American Calamity'. A face that is now staring at him.
What?
Leopold almost flinches back into his chair as he realises that the woman is staring right into the camera he is watching from. Right into his eyes.
Pushing the tablet back to the boy, Leopold lets out a sigh and leans back into his seat, closing his eyes to think for a moment in silence.
Only after half a minute does he open his eyes, speaking without waver as he calmly gives his orders. "Tell Konrad to gather The Verteidiger and meet me in my office with Frederik, then get the guards to let the Fräulein in and guide her to my office."
The boy seems confused, clearly not knowing who the woman is, otherwise he would understand why Leopold would order Gesellschaft's top fighters to gather. But he doesn't question his orders, and hurries to obey them, only to be stopped at the door by Leopold's voice.
"Oh and one more thing. Ensure that she is treated as a guest, this means no searches."
"B-but Herrscher, what if she carries a weapon?" The boy asks, making Leopold roll his eyes as he moves to stand after activating a certain failsafe.
"Boy, turn on the news every now and then. That Fräulein, is enough of a weapon by herself, she needn't bring spares." With his piece said, Leopold proceeds to ignore the boy as he scampers off, and casually strolls down to his office, his stride not showing a hint of concern. He is after all, above such things.
It doesn't take him too long to reach his large, open office, but when he does he is greeted by the sight of everyone he called for already gathered.
Standing stoically behind his desk is Konrad and Frederik, brown and blond hair respectively but almost identical otherwise, well built and tall with the same dark blue eyes. They could easily be mistaken for fraternal twins if not for their vehement refusal of their relation.
But they are not the only ones present, as either side of the room, seven people stand, four women and three men, each dressed in matching, plain black masks and suits that themselves are simply less elaborate versions of what Leopold, Frederik and Konrad are wearing.
Leopold doesn't give The Verteidiger so much as a glance as he moves to his seat, reclining into it with the sort of languid grace only seen in nobility.
The first person to speak after he Leopold sits down is the man on his left, Konrad, the leader of The Verteidiger. "Are you sure it is wise to meet the American yourself Herrscher?"
His words only get a soft, confident chuckle from Leopold, who speaks without turning back, light humour clear in his calm tone. "I should not have anything to fear. You are here, are you not?"
He doesn't see it, but Leopold can picture how he nods his head in acquiescence, just as he does to every point Leopold makes.
"I am, but this American is dangerous."
"Oh? You doubt yourself Konrad? I've only heard you doubt yourself against the 'Great American Hero'. Do you put her on His level?"
"No, she is not that powerful. But she is more honest."
Leopold doesn't respond, simply tilting his head in acknowledgement of the valid point. After all, Eidolon would at least pretend to be merciful in a fight. The approaching woman isn't known for having those same compunctions.
In the ensuing silence, it is Frederik who speaks up next, his voice as identical as his face is to Konrad. "Do you have any idea what she is doing here? Last I heard, she was trying to provoke the CUI."
Leopold shakes his head with an amused, wry smile on his face as he thinks of the reports of the woman 'spreading propaganda' in China, doing a very poor job of hiding how she is waiting for The Yàngbǎn to show up and attempt to stop her.
All it really ended with was her killing or embarrassing a few dozen normal Chinese capes, presumably because the CUI is smart enough to not send their elite units into a meatgrinder.
"I have not a clue," Leopold easily admits, as calm as ever, "but worry not, you know me well enough by now. I'll figure it out."
As if to punctuate his words, a knock sounds out not a moment later, and after one last brief glance around, Leopold straightens up and calls out, "Enter."
This time the door is opened much more sedately, and the young man from earlier hods it open wide as the American walks in, turning her head around like a curious child wanting to observe everything at once.
The boy quietly closes the door behind her, quickly fleeing, while the woman in question comes to a stop in the middle of the room, staring straight up at the mural on the ceiling.
"Maaan, you guys have hella style,~" she says in wonder before turning her green eyes upon Leopold, seeming to be in a state of disbelief as she continues, "I swear I saw some Peking Man skulls and Raphael's 'Portrait of a Young Man' in the hall just now.~"
Leopold would question why she comes all this way to talk about his manor's decorations, but clearly she is not impressed by the wealth displayed, but the rarity. The two things she named have been 'lost' for decades after all.
"Indeed you did. I believe the American saying is.. 'finders keepers'?" He says, getting a startled bark of laughter from the now giggling woman.
"That's uh, that's one way to look at it,~" she says with obvious glee, controlling her laughter into an infrequent huff of amusement and a wide, happy smile, "what was your name again?"
This pleases Leopold, as he was taking something of a risk by making a joke, though not a sizable one. She calls herself a Clown after all, it would only make sense that she be informal, preferring humour to serious talk.
So by opening with a joke, he has endeared himself to her somewhat, given himself a positive image in her mind. He doesn't know how useful that would be, but it's better to have her like him anyway. As Konrad says, she is dangerous.
"You can call me Leopold," he says, offering her a seat with a gesture of the arm, that she accepts, plopping into the seat opposite him, "and I must say, I am pleasantly surprised by your Deutsch, you speak more fluently than some Germans. Impressive for an American, Miss..?"
Unfortunately, his complement doesn't seem to have any effect on her, telling him that she for some reason holds no pride over mastering another language, which tells him that she likely learnt it with the assistance of a power, either her own or another's.
"I'd hardly be much of a tourist if I didn't know how to cuss out the locals in a way they'll understand.~ And you can just call me Lusia.~"
His lips twitch up slightly at her explanation, partly because it was amusing but mostly because reacting positively to her jokes will further boost her opinion of him.
"I can understand the concern Lusia," he says, making sure to say her name, since doing so generally also serves to increase one's opinion of you, before folding his hands together and deciding that that's enough small talk, "however I doubt that you came all this way just to chat about tourism. So why are you here?"
Leaning back, she slides down her chair slightly so that she can rest her legs on his desk, carelessly knocking a stack of papers over, which causes Frederik to tense slightly, disliking the disrespect.
Though Leopold finds his attention more focused on how her new position is giving him a clear look at her panties, something that is obviously intentional since he can clearly see a bright blue Star of David covering her modesty.
His lip twitches at the subtle dig, as he's pretty certain she's not wearing it for religious reasons, and the brief smirk that grows on her face tells him that she finds his amusement amusing.
"Before that, can someone tell me the time? Down to the minute?~" She asks, the non-sequitur almost making Leopold frown, but he controls himself, and with a quick glance to the clock on his wall, he has her answer.
"It's forty-four minutes past seven," he says, figuring that she's not the type to bother asking as some kind of power play, and that if she's asking about time, that delaying things for something as pointless as pride wouldn't be worth it.
"Ah good, that's perfect then.~ See, I figured it's be pretty poetic to do all this at a quarter to eight. Kinda like how I let you notice me at thirty-three past.~"
Her wording suggesting that they would only notice her when she wants them to doesn't escape him, but he is far more focused on the sudden sinking feeling in his gut that her words cause, and he can't shake the feeling that something is about to go terribly wrong.
But before he can even try to voice those concerns, the clock ticks over to forty-five and everyone's attention is brought to a sudden ringing.
Tracing the noise to it's source, Leopold's eyes land on his office phone, reserved for emergency correspondences that cannot wait to be heard, but he does not reach for the phone. Instead, he simply turns his head back to Lusia, his smile gone and replaced by a stern visage as they stare each other down, the only sound being that of the ringing phone until Lusia finally speaks up.
"You should take that, might be important.~"
Tersely, he reaches a hand over to the phone, pressing a button to answer it on speaker, all the while not breaking eye contact with Lusia.
Immediately after the call connects, the sound of heavy breathing fills the office, and Leopold speaks as if he suspects nothing strange. "What is it?"
"Herrscher! Herrscher it's bad! It's, it's all gone!" The frantic, panicked voice of a young man answers.
"Calm down," Leopold orders, "where are you, and what is gone?"
An audible gulp comes through from the other end. "I'm from Jaernu's division Herrscher! It's everything! Everything is gone! Nothing is left from the base except for a giant crater Herrscher!"
"I see," Leopold blandly answers with a sigh, hanging up the call without a care. Jaernu only worked with the narcotics that they spread to weaken the lesser races, so it's not a massive loss.
But before he can say anything more, another ringing goes off, only this time it is coming from Lusia, who takes it out of her skirt's pocket with a bashful smile.
"Ah, sorry. I swear I put it on silent," she says as she answers it, bringing the phone up to her ear only to make a surprised expression before sliding the phone over the desk to Leopold, "it's for you.~"
With a grim frown, Leopold once again presses the speaker button, immediately filling the room with the sound of a blaring alarm, only overshadowed by a screaming voice not a moment later.
"Herrscher!! We're under attack! Fischer and his quad have already fallen and we don't have any parahumans left here!" As he is screaming through Lusia's phone, Leopold's own starts ringing again, and he doesn't bother to listen to the rest of what that man had to say, hanging up Lusia's phone and reaching over to his own, simply hanging up the call directly instead of answering.
But the phone still does not fall silent, and Leopold's mood only falls further when he hears what it has to say.
"You have six missed calls."
Counting the two that were answered, that makes for eight.
Turning to Lusia, Leopold gives her an incredibly bland, if irritated look, doing an admirable job of hiding the simmering wrath within him.
"Why. Are. You. Here." He demands, his voice terse as his hands tightly grip at his chair's armrests.
But Lusia seems as casual as ever, relaxing in her seat without a bother, completely ignoring the steadily growing hostility being levied against her.
"Oh that's easy.~ I'm here to ask nicely.~"
=================
A/N: He~llo! Dear readers!
Oh hoho~ would you look at this~.... wait a minute, did I mention that they were gonna be fighting Gesellschaft last chapter, or was it revealed this chapter?
Fuck it, I can't remember and I cba to check, it's late and I've kept up my bad diet by only eating two bars of white chocolate and two slices of bread that I wrapped around all the cheese I had, because I got thinking about pizza hut's cheesy bites and it was the closest I could get to that. So now I'm gonna round out the day's meals by eating some cheap biscuits and maybe down another few multi-vitamins.
I'm already taking 5x the recommended dosage, but I imagine that that's the recommended for someone who's still eating like a normal human being.
Anywho, next chaps are gonna be showing the clowns doing business, so don't worry about missing out on any of the action here. :3
Also, for those that didn't get the joke, quarter to 8 can be written 1945, which is when nazi germany fell, and 1933 is when it rose, hence why the chap starts at that time. It's symbolic. God I'm such a fucking cool author.
Also, Leopold isn't a real guy, but there's a guy called karl who's real and I'm saying in my world Leopold is the younger brother of Karl.
Also, I'm really fucking tired. shocker, right? I should change my name to Bored&Tired at this point
Also, since I've been getting better as a writer, 2k words has stopped being enough for me to use as a full chapter a lot of the time, so most chaps are 3k at this point, and some might start extending further if I feel like it. So that's nice, a clear evidence of my improvement :)
Comments
Scarletmenace
*preps wolfenstein music*
THE SAVAGE KITTY
Sips reading tea
