A Joke
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One Piece: Desperate
🕑 Added 2021-08-18 06:19:21 +0000 UTCChapter 81: Marriage Contract
***
Max's entry into Tottoland didn't take long to be noticed as an armada of Big Mom's ships came to intercept him.
He looked at them and whistled. "Damn, this almost makes me feel special."
"Sending so many ships, I think you might be more of a big deal than you think Boss-Man," Negan added his unnecessary opinion.
"Yeah," Max agreed. "And I can see Katakuri right at the head of that army. Can't they just think of me as a weak Vice Admiral? C'mon now, underestimate me a little~"
He didn't like things not going according to his plan. But even then, Max had prepared countermeasures against this. Though when it came to these kinds of situations, one could never know how it would turn out. After all, Max couldn't see the future.
The best he could do in these situations was plan things out and have a couple of plans to fall back on. By a couple, he meant a couple of dozen plans to get out of these kinds of situations.
“So? We gonna fight them?” Negan couldn’t hide his excitement. Unlike Max, he wasn’t scared of death and in his eyes, everyone would die one day. Whether it was sooner or later didn’t matter.
“What do you think? Do those guys seem like they are here to talk?” Max asked rhetorically, pointing at the enemy ships. He pulled back his arm and took out his axe, holding it in his hand and ready to send out a devastating air slash.
Pew!
But suddenly, a small jellybean pierced his arm, passing right through flesh like butter. Max stopped his attack midway and looked at the small hole in his arm with an unreadable gaze. “These last few days I have really been humbled.”
“Well, if we die here I will die with the comforting knowledge that we had bigger dicks than our enemies,” Negan tried to say something comforting. But it only made Raynare and Ain look at him in disgust. “Don’t worry small dick guys,” he looked to the rest of the marines. “My dick is big enough to compensate for all your small ones.”
“Damn, can’t you stop talking for once?” complained Max, though the amused smile on his face said another story.
“No,” Negan refuted him without missing a beat. “At least not while I am awake.”
Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom!...
Canons roared from the enemy’s ships, the cannonballs with faces on them seemed to change their direction and aim straight for Max’s ship. But Negan waved his hand and a net of electricity shot about, electrocuting the metal cannonballs and making them explode mid-air.
CRASH!!!
Suddenly huge pieces of the ship shot around, and Fishmen came out of the water, having pierced right through the ship.
“Yeah, this is kinda bad,” Max admitted, even he seemed a little nervous now. But his Conqueror’s Haki flew out like a wave, knocking out all of the fishmen underwater and those that had also attacked the ship. “Binz!! Use your Grow-Grow Fruit to patch the holes in the ship! Ain you stop any cannonballs from hitting the ship. Raynare, Negan, you are with me, it’s time to take the fight to them.”
After saying that, he jumped up, entering his hybrid form and ready to use <Geppo>.
Pew! Pew!
Two beans suddenly pierced both of his thighs, making Max drop back into the ship. He looked towards the Big Mom fleet hatefully, or more correctly at the one who shot the jelly beans. Katakuri, the man's eyes were on Max like a hawk looking at its prey.
"That guy is a whole lot of trouble," complained Max, before tightening the muscles around his wound to stop the bleeding. He had already taken injuries before the battle had even started and he didn’t like this. After all, he didn’t want to fight someone like Katakuri in less than his best condition.
Max then took out three rumble balls and ate them, allowing himself to enter Awakening. Like always, his body buffed up to giant-like proportions.
<Life Return: Speed mode>
But his body released an unnatural amount of steam and slimmed down. Now Max was around the same size as katakuri, all of his muscles had compressed down and composed themselves for a speed built.
<Kamisori> (Razorblade)
He used a combination between Geppo and Soru that allowed him to move at incredible speeds, breaking through the sound barrier, and within an instant, he was in front of the Big mom Fleet. This way. Katakuri was unable to shoot him down due to Max’s speed outclassing him and the thrown jelly beans were now too slow to hit him.
“A good day we are having isn’t it?” Asked Max politely.
“Perororororoin~” Perospero laughed. “At least he still has his manners.”
“That doesn't mean much,” commented Smoothie, pulling out her sword.
Fwish!
An air slash was shot towards Max, whose body casually moved to the side, leaving an afterimage, making it seem like he was hit at first looks. “Well, that’s kinda rude.”
“He is fast,” Katakuri muttered, his eyes narrowing in caution. “Also be careful of his words, don’t let them distract you,” though he said all of this softly and without yelling it out loud, every one of the siblings heard him. They also took his warning seriously, Katakuri wouldn’t say something like this if the enemy wasn’t dangerous.
"Let's test this danger that you speak of, brother," said Cracker, he was still in his biscuit armor. Two more biscuit soldiers that looked similar to his armor appeared and attacked. Jumping towards Max with their swords raised and shields ready to block any attack.
Fwish!
Though before everyone's eyes, those biscuit soldiers were destroyed in an instant with his axe. The biscuit creations were quite resistant to blunt attacks, so that wasn't something that Max would use when attacking them. After all, doing the same thing and expecting a different result was the definition of insanity.
Max knew that the people in front of him were an unsurpassable wall and numbers did matter in this kind of fight. None of the strong ones would fall over because of some Conqueror's Haki, so he had to fight each one of them.
Though that would be an impossible situation for Max alone… currently he wasn't alone.
*bzzzzt*
In an electrical charge, Negan's body took form next to him. "You are fast, Boss-Man, are you sure your fruit is just a simple Zoan?"
"C'mon now, I wouldn't lie to you about something like this," said Max jokingly, his words coming out as a growl. "I am but a simple grizzly bear."
Mochi suddenly shot out into two big globs, but a lightning net appeared in front of them, scattering the attack. Negan's electricity could heat up and stop attacks like that. So against Katakuri, he was a good matchup for the mochi-man, an exact counter against his abilities.
But Max knew that in the end, Negan would still lose in a fight. Katakuri's Devil Fruit wasn't that special or too good, at least in comparison to New World standards. But the Mochi Fruit user, a.k.a Katakuri, made that mediocre fruit into a killing machine. Turning its simple properties into something very powerful.
Even though Max respected someone like Katakuri, whose efforts lead to his power. It didn't mean that he would go easy on his enemies.
No matter who they were...
***
