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My "Stash"
🕑 Added 2019-10-18 16:25:32 +0000 UTCA few years ago, in the middle of a family move, my wife nearly discovered my stash. No, not that kind of stash. I’m talking about the stash nearly every teenage boy my generation had:
A porn stash.
Not to be confused with the ‘pornstache’ (worn by many entertainers of the day), a ‘porn stash’ consisted of whatever masturbatory material me and my mates could get our mitts on in the multi-media deprived 1980s. This was typically magazines (Playboy and Penthouse ruled the day) or bootlegged videotapes (usually a copy of a copy), but really any picture of a hot girl in a state of undress would do.
At least for most. In my case, I use the word ‘porn’ very loosely, because had my parents come across my ‘stash’ back then they probably would have been more confused than anything. While my friends were beating bologna to blurry bush tapes, I was mangling my manhood to diet ads ripped from Redbook.
You know the ones I mean—with before-and-after pictures where the ‘before’ featured a miserable looking girl in crappy lighting with her head down and her belly pushed out, and an ‘after’ that showed the same girl done up like a glamour model with whitened teeth and her tummy tucked. Those were the best. Even back then, I knew it was advertising bullshit (“from fat and miserable to pretty and perfect in six short weeks!”), but those prejudiced images sure helped stimulate my mental reversal of them (“from haughty hottie to insecure heifer in six short weeks!”).
In addition to before-and-after diet ads, I accumulated numerous tabloid articles documenting the “blimping out” (usually just an unflattering camera angle) of various starlets at the time, photographs of plump friends and acquaintances, as well as a number of my own drawings and stories composed “for my eyes (and other parts of my anatomy) only.” My Holy Grail was a handful of pictures taken from Playboy—one was of a barely chubby Co-ed in a string bikini (from a Girls of Spring Break photo shoot), one was a pre-Playboy photo of a Centerfold “before she lost her baby fat” according to the caption, and the others were from a short pictorial spread on plus-size models circa 1983. Considering my Father collected every Playboy from 1968-2000 (and I snuck glances at nearly all of them) that gives you an idea of just how barren the BBW landscape was back then.
Unfortunately, I lost a good chunk of my stash in the “Great Move of ’90,” when I hastily trashed a thick black binder that contained most of it lest my Mom discover it while packing. You’d think that would have been the least of my concerns, especially since we were moving cross-country in the middle of my Junior year, but its loss was pretty traumatic for me. There were five+ years of carefully created and cultivated BBW and weight-gain smut in there!
Kids today have it easy. (I know, get off my lawn!) Today, there’s porn for every proclivity at your fingertips and instead of hiding your stash you only have to worry about clearing your cache. I’m a little jealous, of course, but had I not been forced to use my imagination to satisfy my deviant desires, I may never have developed as an artist and writer…and I’m certain this Patreon page would not exist.
I’m posting a few of the surviving (and somewhat embarrassing) vestiges of my original ‘stash’ for you to peruse. Maybe it will inspire you to create or share some of your own?
Maverick
Comments
Maverick and Riptoryx
The Spice Girls: 90s-era international ambassadors for unintentional weight gain! -Riptoryx
Adriano Ziffer
So very true. The hottest article I ever read was in one of my grandma's magazine and depicted Geri Halliwell's weight gain. I still remember how juicy her little tummy was. 😍
Maverick and Riptoryx
Yes! Good call, Blackbeen. Many times I found the comics and pin-up illustrations (by such luminaries as Alberto Vargas and LeRoy Nieman) for more titillating than the models. Their vintage and timeless takes on the classic hourglass figure were far superior to most of the skinny-minnies the magazine championed. I'll try to post some examples...
Maverick and Riptoryx
That was an amazing spread! If for no other reason than it went against Hugh Hefner's tacit (but well-documented) "no fatties" pledge. The girls in the article probably wouldn't be considered fat today, but circa 1983? It was really something. I didn't discover the spread until around 1987-1988, and it was the first time I'd ever seen a BBW presented nude and seductively (other than in my mind!) I tried to find images from the issue to post along with my musing, but struck-out. (Of course, I lost my originals back in the "Great Move of '90.") Do you still have the magazine, Matt? I'd love to see the images again.
Greg Gasiorowski
The only thing in Playboy that did it for me were the chubby cherub nymphs that were featured in the (?) late 60's/70's in comics, this was going way back to the origin.
Matt L.
I remember the Playboy plus size model spread very well, I even both a copy the day it went on sale. One of the models was plugging the article on the old Phil Donahue show when the show was broadcast from Chicago. Likewise, I would pick up copies of the latest celebrity gossip magazines, occasionally they would have articles about certain female celebs packing on the pounds, and I would use my sister's name and order catalogs from Lane Bryant to check out the fuller figure models.
Maverick and Riptoryx
You guys with your Playboys and your Redbooks. So fancy! Growing up more than a smidge on the "poor" side in the 90s, *my* primary source of "real" photos was lingerie advertisements in Macy's and Mervyn's circulars that came bundled with the Sunday newspaper. They weren't even "plus size" models, generally, but sometimes one of the gals might look a bit plump, caught at a less flattering angle, or stuffed into a slightly-too-snug bra and panty set. Over the years I harvested a hefty cache of semi-relevant material from that effort, but in retrospect...boy, talk about scraping the bottom of the barrel. Beyond that, my other main source of "stash" material tended to be illustrations of female characters that I copied (usually from MAD Magazine or Cracked) using trace paper and then clumsily (yet painstakingly) "edited" into progressively fatter, frumpier, and more embarrassed-looking version of themselves. I'm pretty sure there's still a pile of that stuff squirreled away somewhere back at my parents' house. Maybe I should dig it out sometime and share bits of here? -Riptoryx
Greg Gasiorowski
Man, Redbook diet ads ran in reverse in mind constituted puberty for me.
Maverick and Riptoryx
Thanks, Jake and Mookie! I know Maverick's got some fun stories nearly ready. There'll also be occasional commentaries on various topics, like this one. Hopefully both provide some entertainment value! -Riptoryx
Seconded - both the authors of all time classics
Jake
Eagerly looking forward to all the work you guys do.
