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3.36 - Heart to Heart
🕑 Added 2024-07-04 22:00:22 +0000 UTCFor the next couple of days, He Yu did everything he could to avoid admitting that Chen Fei had been right. Eventually, it got to be too much, and he made his way to Li Heng’s home. He knew his friend’s routine well enough, and made sure he stopped by in the morning, after Li Heng had spent the night cultivating under the light of the moon. That way, he’d be sure to catch him when he wasn’t too busy.
It took longer than he would have liked, but eventually Li Heng answered He Yu’s knocks. After a somewhat curt exchange, he allowed He Yu to come inside. Once they’d passed into the courtyard with its manicured garden displaying all of what late spring offered in the Shrouded Peaks, Li Heng turned and crossed his arms.
“So. What is it?” he asked.
It was curt. It was abrupt. It was also too much.
“What is it? What’s with you? You’re acting like I’ve somehow wronged you.”
“Am I? Perhaps I’m just focused on other things at the moment.”
“Focused on what?” he demanded. “You barely said more than two words to me since I’ve returned, and you won’t see me when I come by. Even I can tell there’s something going on.”
“I need to train,” Li Heng said. There was a finality to it, like there had been the last time He Yu had visited.
Before Li Heng could kick him out, He Yu asked, “But why? Train for what? Like, sure, we need to reach Golden Core. But that’s no different than it was before, right?”
“No different,” Li Heng said. A bit of the earlier hardness had left his words. “Easy for you to say, I suppose.”
That caught He Yu off guard. After a moment of trying to collect his thoughts, and failing to come up with what seemed like an adequate response, he asked, “Is that what this is about?”
Something seemed to break within Li Heng then. His shoulders slumped, and he leaned against a pillar. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this,” he said.
“Supposed to be like what?” He Yu asked, sitting down a few feet away from Li Heng.
Li Heng turned towards He Yu, and he seemed to be searching for something. After a moment, he slid down the pillar to join He Yu on the ground. “I was supposed to be the genius.”
He Yu didn’t respond. On the one hand, he didn’t really know what to say. On the other hand, it was pretty clear that Li Heng simply needed the space. Whatever was eating at him, he needed to get it out on his own terms.
After a few moments’ silence, Li Heng continued. “My grandfather is Li Renshu. My father is General Li Bao. We’re a young family, but both my father and my grandfather were exceptional talents of their generation. I have been learning cultivation theory from the time I was seven years old. When I began cultivating, I had the best teachers my family could find, and my father’s personal attention whenever he could spare the time. I had access to the best resources. I came to the Shrouded Peaks Sect with the expectation that I would, at least, live up to the tiniest fraction of what my father and grandfather were capable of.”
The Li patriarch, Li Renshu, was a legend in his own right. He ascended to the Seventh Realm—Divine Body Attainment—and earned his appointment as the Marquis of the Western Passage. It was an important and influential position because of its strategic importance to the Dragon Empire, and thus highly coveted. The current outer head of the Li family, General Li Bao, was himself at the early Soul Refining stage—the Sixth Realm.
To say that the Li were young, small, and vulnerable was a bit of an understatement. The only reason they could maintain their position in the face of their rivals was the combined power of Li Bao and Li Renshu. Even among the ducal clans, Seventh Realm cultivators were rare, and a hidden patriarch was a potent deterrent.
“Okay,” He Yu began. It was fairly obvious that he would need to proceed carefully, but he didn’t think Li Heng was being fair to himself. “You realize that among the outer disciples, you were one of the strongest by a pretty big measure, right? And you haven’t been slacking or anything. You’re only twenty, and closing in on the peak of Body Refining. And you’ve formed a Wayborn Seed.”
“Not strong enough,” he said. Li Heng thumped the back of his head against the pillar and stared up at the perpetually gray sky.
“Compared to who? I’m sure you could have beaten Sha Xiang if it were just the two of you fighting.” It wasn’t exactly true, and He Yu knew it. Tan Xiaoling had expressed doubt about her own ability to face down Sha Xiang. And then Zhang Lifen had basically spirited He Yu away from the sect so that Sha Xiang wouldn’t target him.
Li Heng gave a low, bitter laugh. “I’m not. But I was talking about you.”
For that, He Yu had no response.
“Don’t pretend you don’t know it,” Li Heng said as the silence stretched between them. “You surpassed me before we even reached the inner sect. Now it seems Sha Xiang has as well. I could have lived with staying in Tan Xiaoling’s shadow, at least if I had kept ahead of everyone else.”
While He Yu certainly knew better than most what it was like to stare up at your supposed peers and nothing but strength, he also knew that Li Heng was selling himself short.
“You aren’t weak,” he said.
“But I’m still not strong enough.”
“And?” He Yu asked. “What about when I first arrived at the sect? That was weak. If it hadn’t been for you, I likely would have never reached Foundation in time to keep my place here.”
“Don’t pretend that you’d have had any difficulty.”
“Don’t pretend that you’ve forgotten who protected me in those first days.”
Li Heng looked away. “A noble’s duty—”
“I don’t give a shit about a noble’s duty,” He Yu practically shouted, leaning forward. “I want my friend back.”
“I’m not much of a friend,” Li Heng muttered.
“I don’t care,” he said. “You looked out for me when I had nothing to offer. You helped me find my feet in the sect, and that matters to me. I don’t care if you think you’re a rotten friend, because you’ve been a good one from where I’m standing.”
“Why does it matter so much?”
He Yu joined Li Heng in staring up at the sky then. After another moment, he answered.
“Early on, like, when I’d just arrived at the sect, I had an insight while cultivating. I saw myself standing atop a mountain. I had reached the peak of cultivation, but I was alone. No friends, no enemies, just me. I had been more or less alone for my whole life until I came here. I didn’t want that. Since meeting you and all the others, all the insights I’ve had about my advancement included all of you. Sometimes you’re distant, and other times you’re close. But you’re there, and that’s what’s important to me.”
“Da Ning has my sword,” Li Heng said.
“Then we’ll get it back.”
“I can’t. He’s ranked below me, so he won’t lose much face if he doesn’t accept a challenge. If I attack outright, that’s just an invitation to Sha Xiang and the rest to join in.”
“Then I’ll get it back.”
Li Heng looked as though he’d swallowed something bitter. “If I can’t get it back on my own, do I truly deserve it?”
“Let it drive you,” He Yu said. He sounded almost like he was pleading. “Look, even I can tell there’s more than what you’ve told me. Whatever is really eating at you, I believe that you’ll figure it out. If it’s just that you haven’t reached Golden Core at twenty, well, that’s stupid. Not even Zhang Lifen did that. Princess Tan is a year older than you, and she hasn’t done it either. We’re immortals, so we’ve got plenty of time.”
“I don’t even know if I can achieve the Fourth Realm,” Li Heng said.
“I know you can,” He Yu shot back. “And if you can’t do it on your own, I’ll drag you kicking and screaming into it if I have to.”
“You’re that certain you’ll do it?” Li Heng asked.
“I’m going all the way, and I’m taking you with me. You know I gave Chen Fei a mid-grade stone before the tournament, right?”
“Oh? You trying to tell me something?” Li Heng asked, a bit of his usual humor finally creeping into his words.
“No! I didn’t want to leave her behind in the outer sect. That’s all I’m trying to say. You, Chen Fei, Yan Shirong, even Tan Xiaoling. I’m not leaving any of you behind. If the biggest thing eating at you is your sword, then I’ll get it back. Got it, elder brother?”
Li Heng turned serious again then. “I appreciate it, but you have to know you can’t take them all on.”
“Maybe not now,” he said.
“You’re that close, are you?” Li Heng asked.
“I can’t say for certain, but I think that’s why Zhang Lifen brought me back to the sect after only a month of training.”
“You know,” Li Heng said, his tone careful, “I was pretty mad when you failed your breakthrough. When I was lying in the medicine hall, I couldn’t stop thinking that if you’d done it, Sha Xiang wouldn’t have even tried.”
“You’re probably right,” he said. “But that’s not important now. What’s important is that I end things with her once and for all.”
“A bit of a reversal, that one,” Li Heng said with a laugh that was only a little bitter. “To think that you’d be the one looking out for me.”
“First off, I already told you it’s the least I can do. Besides, don’t forget that I’ve got my own score to settle with her. If paying her back for attacking my friends is part of the package, I’m more than happy to take it.”
“So that’s your plan, then? Advance to Golden Core and take them all on?”
“I’ve never been good at plans,” He Yu said.
“Well, it’s as good a plan as any,” Li Heng replied.
With the humor returning to Li Heng’s demeanor, He Yu finally felt himself relax. He’d learned enough about other people in his time at the sect and through his cultivation to know that there was more eating at him. That could wait, though. The most pressing issue, and the one that held the most immediate threat to their friendship, seemed to have been resolved. Whatever else Li Heng was dealing with, they were all things the noble had to come to terms with himself.
Upon leaving, He Yu fixed his eyes to the north. Ever since returning to the sect, the feeling of pressure in his dantian had grown. He’d since been drawn to the peaks just north of the inner sect mountain. The peaks where, with the coming of summer, black clouds heavy with rain and flashing with heaven’s fury gathered.
He’d meant what he said to Li Heng—that he’d advance to the Fourth Realm and finally put to rest the rivalry between him and Sha Xiang. If it meant that he’d have to take on all three of her followers too, then he’d do it. Especially if it meant repaying her for the cowardly attack on his friends.
